Friday, December 24, 2010

To Listen and Do, Or Listen and Do Whatever You Think Is Best

So I have been thinking a lot about recommendations and advice we are given once we become parents.  I have only been a parent for 6 short months and I can't tell you how many people have told me what I should or shouldn't be doing.  I get advice from random people, family, friends, doctors, and emails.  If you know me or have ever met me for longer than a few minutes, you know I do what I WANT.  I try hard not to be rude, but I am not a sugarcoater, and I stand up for what I believe in.  I guess you could say, I am going to do whatever I want.  I don't live to please others, I don't believe in doing something just to make others happy, and I certainly don't give in without a fight. 

I have been very frustrated over the past few months because of responses I have been getting.  My sons doctor started recommending I feed him rice cereal at 3 months.  I really couldn't believe he was telling me this.  I said I wouldn't be feeding him anything but breast milk and he just nodded his head.  Then again I was being pushed to feed him at 4 months.  Needless to say, I just nodded my head in agreement, went home and continued to breastfeed only.  I am pleased to say, my son was breastfeed exclusively for 6 1/2 months before he had any table food. 

Another really frustrating thing I am told is that I need to leave my son.  In other words, I need to go out and do things without him.  I have already wrote about this, but I find it so frustrating that people think they know better than me.  I also think its strange that people think it will make me a better person to leave my son.  Here is what I know about myself, I am a better mom when I am taking care of my son.  I know when I need some down time and I ask my husband for it.  He takes over playtime and I am free to clean, sew, cook, do the dishes, or just relax, while also seeing my son and knowing he is okay.  This makes me a better mom... not being away from my child.

Another recommendation I have been given, is to let him cry.  People say, "don't run to him when he cries, don't jump up when he fusses."  Here is what I know, babies cry for a reason.  They need their parents to be there for them, and I will always want my son to know I am there for him.  Sometimes babies are just fussy and we don't know why, but that doesn't mean they should be left to cry by themselves.  Babies and kids need to know they are loved and that they can trust someone will always be there for them. 

How about when you are told that your child needs to be fed a certain way, given every shot, or that breastfeeding in public is embarrassing.  Have you ever done research on why babies need purred food?  I have and they don't need it unless you are feeding them food to early for their digestive system.  Babies don't ever have to eat food from the jar.  They don't have to eat rice cereal.  Have you ever tasted those things?  They are really gross.  What about the shots?  Have you ever second guessed your doctor and asked why they need all those shots, or said no to some of them?  It's okay to ask questions and be proactive for your child's health.  Then when it comes to breastfeeding and those cover ups, I just want to scream.  If you want to use them, more power to you.  If you don't want to cover up, then good for you too!  I just wish everyone would keep to themselves about it.  It's a baby and a boob, who really cares!  When did we all get so crazy about seeing some skin? 

So, when it comes to you and your children, do you listen and do, or do you do whatever you want?  Stay strong and know that you are the parent.  You know what is best and do whatever you believe is in the best interest for your family 

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